This was Sam's free-writing assignment he brought home today and did Monday or Tuesday at school. In case you're not used to reading "write it how it sounds" first grade prose, this is what it says:
"Once my Dad gave me a wedgie. It really hurt. It reached up to my belly. And it really! Really! really! hurt!"
You can imagine my reaction when I took this out of his backpack this afternoon. I would only me more mortified if it said "My Mom gave me a wedgie."
Unfortunately, the wedgie part is true. The "really really hurt" part is not, unless Sam has developed an unbelievable threshold for pain in the last few days, since he is usually quite dramatic when suffering any type of injury.
Here's what happened. Sam has been very interested in wedgies since seeing Alvin and the Chipmunks the Squeakquel. So Saturday night the Smiths were over and Sam was talking about wedgies and asked Ben to give him one. This of course led to conversations about wedgies in college, making Sam want one even more. So Ben agreed to give him a wedgie, and Ben gave him a very gentle wedgie, and he said "Ow, that hurt." And that was really the end of it.
I'm clinging to the fact that at least there were witnesses here if Childrens' Services pay us a visit in the near future.
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